27 years old, 84 hours and counting on……moving forward ever en giving thx for all the blessings en lessons with this new year…….when it rains, it pours, en floods, en thunders……lightning is jus part of the flow. This story is about me, for the purposes of this blog, a (not-so) fictional identity…molisa nyakale. mwana wa dunia…..
There once was a warrior-princess, who got a few gifts before her birthday…..a couple of magical, special stories….one started like…….Once upon a time a Gangsta met a Priestess who was a Princess and they lived happily ever after…despite their bickering over their approaches to world peace and Afrikan liberation….en another story, of a lil bird that travelled all over the world……en all of these were documented, tied together in inescapable hands of destiny, en the memories of ancestors……(why 40 years ago on the same night, Malcolm X’s house was bombed….there’s something about the night…..)
These were the chosen stories, before the warrior princess’s earth day, before that the world shook, dreams got shattered, en promises broken. En so, after, she switched up her re/solutions……there were gonna be 3 priorities now…..
her mama, who she had chosen, en who had known her the longest……marta, the merciful one, who saved her…….and her number one priority was ME…..because it starts with one
En then on her birthday, the world shook up again….she had no choice but to surrender, her wife left her…the pain was transformative, she asked the question many times, “why today? do I not derserve happiness on at least this ONE day, why would the one person that I had chosen to celebrate with, choose to show me this today?” she survived…….at least she finally had a ‘drama’ story for her birthday…she was after all a drama queen, it was only fitting
en in another place, not here, she held on to visions of homelands…..mama afrika!
En reconciled herself to the reality of foreign lands…she had alot to give thanks for……
En then the day after, she was recovering, praying for some money to come through because she had overdue deadlines, and had spent the last precious money she had on a gamble for an/other…..for the first time she tried to go to AmeriKKKa….and had her visa application denied….reason? hadn’t demonstrated strong ties to Canada……after having immigrated 8 years ago to the country….after having left the country only once for a year……..it seemed she didn’t have strong enough ties…how could they know the truth? That this place is a hold-over, a resting place, a learning institution for the duties calling at home……but they couldn’t know that it hadn’t always been that way…..when she first came to Canada, she was excited…..took years to settle into her ‘new’ home….began to forget the dreams she came with….and adjusted to the privilege of first world living…..National health care is quite alright..government loans to go to school are amazing….till you have to pay them back .and visible queer communities are just a bonus……till you find that the black communities are hella fragmented and that jus being queer is ‘not’ enough………
This story is now about one of the chosen ones, of the lil bird, that travelled……last night it went to turkey and saw a trans woman get murdered…
For your information:
On February 17 (last night) another trans-woman was found dead in her apartment ın Şehremin, İstanbul. Her name was Fevzi Yener and she was Aycan as a nickname. She was stabbed from 17 different points on her body. Aycan was together with her friend and she was also tried to be killed but she could escape from the emergeny exit in the apartment. Aycan’s friend has been hospitalized and she is recovering at the moment.
who knows where this lil bird will go tomorrow? it’s somewhere over the ocean…..dipping into the wotas for sustenance and heading back to Afrika